If you could be stuck with one person on a desert Island...

I'm Sorry, But You need to get over it.

I love reading beautiful quotes from the internet. to be honest its usually all i post. WISH I WAS ORIGINAL. :P

here is my recent fav.

"If you could buy love, they'd sell crushes on street corners."

oh, and I started watching tru blood. <3

Wayne's world. party time. excellent.

drunk. don't blog. I hate myself.

HE LOVES ME BACK.

I LOVE HIM.

how is it possible

how is it possible for me to fall out of everything I thought was right into the arms of something that is so wrong..... but not feel anything as it is happening.

so vague i know.

I wish i knew what I was talking about.

I miss my room mate and she has been gone for less then 6 hours.

so many random thoughts.....

i'm lonely.

...

Rotoscoping is what I should be doing.

"I probably shouldn't tell you this."

"just tell me. You can trust me."

"I know I can, that's why I shouldn't tell you."

"You can't just do that. Now I'm so curious."

"I donno, I guess... I sometimes assume we will get married someday. It would be perfect."

Untitled. Becuase I can.

"Yes.t and when you find me rape me"

Today is blog day.

I really Have so much on my mind recently. I need to type it all down. and I still thank rio for showing me this, I never knew that this could be such a... relief. This is probably going to be a more... abstract blog because I'm browsing deviant art, and sitting in class. so here goes:

"Forbidden love"

by *Tyshea

~~...I wish I was the clove

rfield monster...~~

Those emo pictures with bloody wrists, or blood strewn about a beautiful girls body.... I can honestly say they scare the shit out of me in the most beautiful way.

know what i mean? Rio is texting me form the  fray concert. jealous. I'm a bit bored right now. and i can feel a pimple cluster forming on the side of my head in my hair. I realize i have flawless skin, but just about any imperfection drives me bonkers. I'll agonize over it for a few days for sure.

Jesse just texted me too. He was really fucked up last night and is telling me about it. apparently he was playing mario kart in his head. LOL. and apparently he was driving up mount moon to see the clefairies. LMFAO.

(this is the closest picture to involve mario kart and pokemon)

and here is a clefairy.

sigh. this random blog has really hit the spot. 

Quit it.

Seriously. 

stop.

stop stop stop stop stop.

it's not worth it.

no one will understand.

it will hurt you.

you will hurt others.

YOU WILL LOOSE THE TWO THINGS YOU CARE MOST ABOUT.

stop. 

stop stop stop stop stop.

Go crawl in a hole.

You'll hate yourself more then you do now.

stop. 

words I'll never forget.

 "guess what?"

"what?"

"seriously, just guess."

"um... I don't know."

"I guess I'll have to show you..."

Dreams

I have been dreaming a lot about love and things like it. I would like to say it ISN'T because I fall asleep every night reading breaking dawn, but I think it probably has a lot to do with it. At least I haven't been dreaming about werewolves and vampires.... yet. I had a really vivid dream last night, and it was pretty much exactly what I was doing before I fell asleep, which made it a bit harder to figure out what was real and what wasn't. that is of course, until I woke up. anyways we were sitting on the couch, Cassidy had his head in my lap as usual. The only difference was that Meagan was there, which I guess should have tipped me off that it wasn't actually happening. Rio and Meagan were in the  bathroom getting ready for bed and me and Cass were just sitting around watching TV. The weird part was that he leaned up and kissed me and when I asked what that was for he said i looked like I had been waiting for it for a really long time. Don't think this gets spicy, because the dream pretty much shifted right after that to us all going to blockbuster and renting a movie, then watching it on an outdoor screen on the (now non-existent) pen hi front lawn. Sigh. eff my brain. 

eblarg.

I'm at work and i think i already managed to get donw 90% of the stuff i had to do. I'm holding off doing the other 10% becuase i still have an hour and a half to do it. balls. the nice thing is that rio and josh have been hanging out the whole time and i enjoy the company. this is really just a "pass the time" blog entry. so here is a list in point form of what is on my mind.

• Cassidy. But he is always on my mind.
• Matt. Kinda in the back, but i really do feel bad about the break up.
• Rio. More about the house then just her, but I'm going to help out around there alot more for her, I agree that i am quite a slob.
• Meagan and Adam. They are one now, it's nice..... but also I really never saw it coming.
• Jesse, Luke, and Norman (aka chasing red lights) I really want to design them a poster, but I don't have much faith in myself to come up with anything creative.
• work schedule. will i be able to pay off my last quarter? I don't WANT to be thinking of this.
• Cassidy. More. and whistler. it's going to be a really sick trip.
• this is internet "eblarg." I've decided to rename this post right now.
• BORED AS TITS.

Once

Every once in a while there is a song, or an artist who really affects me.

Right now it is a couple of songs, including classical orchestra music.

this is the first time that I have really appreciated this type of music and I really really wish this would have happened to me earlier. I guess I would have been too young to really listen to it. 

But all the same I just can't stop listening. It's on repeat over and over again on my ipod, on my laptop, and playing in my head throughout the day. 

I've tried to figure out why it is so important to me now and I have a few theories. There is the fact that there are no lyrics for one. Songs with lyrics can really force you to apply a tone to it, but these songs, they sing in your head. At any point that I listen to this song I can just think of what ever mood I need to be into, and I calm down, let my emotions pour out, and finally put my brain on hold.

It's.... breathtaking. 

yes I know.

yes.

I like twilight.

blogspot is my secret twilight fan girl explosion.

sorry.

I should care more.

it's weird even to me that i don't.

but i only love

HIM.

I was broken...

I was tied

and now I'm bound.

My head is off the ground.

For a long time was so weary,

tired of the sound,

I've heard before

knowing of the nighttime at the door

haunted by the things i've deemed.

Stuck between the burning light

and the dusty shade.

I used to think the past was dead and gone.

I was wrong.

So wrong.

Whatever makes a flower,

must make you strong.

At my time i've melted into many forms

from the day that I was born. 

but I know there is no place to hide. 

stuck between the burning shade and the faded light.

I was broken for a long time

but it's over now.